Sermon
Grateful
for forgiveness gen 33:1-4
The
story of Jacob and Esau is a classic story of forgiveness. tell the
story.
Jacob
loved by Rachel, his mom
Esau
loved by isaac the dad
Esau
sells his birth right for a bowl of soup
Rachel
helps Jacob steal the patriarchal blessing [father is almost blind]
Esau
wants to kill Jacob. Jacob flees
Years
later they meet up in this scripture
Jacob
looked up and there was Esau, coming with his four hundred men; so he divided
the children among Leah, Rachel and the two female servants. 2 He
put the female servants and their children in front, Leah and her children
next, and Rachel and Joseph in the rear. 3 He himself went on
ahead and bowed down to the ground seven times as he approached his brother. 4 But
Esau ran to meet Jacob and embraced him; he threw his arms around his neck and
kissed him. And they wept.
I
am thankful for forgiveness. So was Jacob.
[seemingly
big sins make us appreciate forgiveness]
But
Esau was glad for forgiveness too.
Thank
God that God forgives us!
Psalm 103:12 As far as the east is
from the west, so far hath he removed our transgressions from us.
Oh,
the relief of being forgiven when you knew that you deserved something else.
We
are all thankful for forgiveness
The
forgiveness that we receive
And
thankful for the chance to forgive others-this is how we find a clean heart.
Forgiveness
We all understand this
People
that we want to punch in the head…..
A
Priest holding confessional asked---the Spanish fighter and patriot, Narvaez if
he had anyone to forgive…..looked astonished he said, "Father, I
have no enemies, I have shot them all.
The business partner that stole from me
The rapist, the employer, the church member,
The cheater
The nazi’s, osama ben laden
At the core of every moment of forgiveness is the realization that Someone hurt
me
But
we know that we have hurt others as well
forgiveness is the main stuff of Christianity
Forgiveness of others
It's not easy
The concept of separation and reconciliation is central to the Christian
faith…..
Methodists, Catholics, Baptists, Presbyterians believe this
but, As if it were optional, many Christians push Forgiveness over in the
corner, like maybe one of these days I will get around to it
if we withhold forgiveness, there is no joy, no grace> > What would it be
like if God said, peace, joy, but there was no forgiveness.
Optional for humans, not optional for human Christ followers
To reject the call for forgiveness is to reject the one who teaches that we
must do it
So in effect, if you refuse to forgive someone, you are rejecting Jesus
and you are not on board with what God is trying to do in this world
there are many Misconceptions about forgiveness [back by popular demand… a
request for repeat]
1. Approval of what they did
2. Excusing what they did
3. Justifying what they did
4. Not pardoning what they did- Forgiveness is different than justice and
consequences
It is ok to get a restraining order. It is ok to go to court if need be.
5. Reconciliation - Restoration of fellowship- you don’t have to go for pizza
Doesn’t
always happen. Things can't always go back to the way that they were
6. Not a denying of what they did
7. Forgetting
Setting
up boundaries with a person. They are toxic. They are going to hurt and abuse
over and over. Forgiving is not forgetting.
What
forgiveness is………
1.
Forgiveness is being honest about my role…… did he really hurt me or do I have
unmet even unrealistic expectations? Sometimes we can get past our anger
to see that we have played a role….
2.Forgiving
is personal. You forgive people, not institutions or organizations. No one has
ever been hurt by the church. People get hurt by people in that church.
I will never forgive that business that fired me. I will never forgive the
church. You cant forgive a faceless institution.
This is why some people get stuck in life.
3.Forgiveness
is absorbing the pain
I must die to my self..to my importance..my
ideas, my pride.. I make another important I make a mean person important..I
give up my place for them. This is love.
True
forgiveness is hard to extend because it demands that people let go of
something they value--not a piece of jewelry, but pride, perhaps, as
sense of justice, or desire for revenge.
Or the desire to hurt back
A
Nobel prize winner tells the story of a marriage that disintegrates over a bar
of soap.
It was the wife's job to keep the house in order, including the towels,
toilet paper and soap in the bathroom. One day she forgot to replace the soap.
her husband exaggerated the oversight: "I've been bathing for almost a
week without any soap." She vigorously denied forgetting to replace the
soap. Although she had indeed forgotten, her pride was at stake, and she
wouldn't back down. For the next seven months, they slept in separate rooms and
ate in silence. Their marriage had suffered a heart attack. "Even when
they were old and placid," "they were very careful about bringing it
up, for the barely healed wounds could begin to bleed again as if they'd been
inflicted only yesterday." How can a bar of soap ruin a marriage? The
answer is actually simple. because neither partner would say. "Forgive
me."
Sometimes
it doesn’t matter who was right. You take the hit to keep the
relationship.
if This concept sounds familiar. Isn't it what Jesus did?
if you don’t absorb the pain, you don’t forgive. It is not simply a thing
of mental assent, we must absorb the pain.
4. Forgiveness – point in time, a choice and a process
.
Maybe step one is deciding that you really are not going to kill them. It’s a
start. Considering the fact that these people may be forgivable may be a
radical concept for you.
If I can wave my hand and forgive you, then
what was between us wasn’t very much
When
the pain goes deep the road to forgiveness is long
The greater the hurt, the greater the blessing that comes from forgiveness
Forgiveness is point in time...you can decide
But
it is also a process , it takes time….
It is like pulling on the rope that rings the bell
Even after you let go, the bell rings for a while
It takes a while for the hurt to stop..but it will
it begins with a choice
5. Forgiveness is needed by you as much if not more than the person you
may need to forgive.
I hope you will choose to forgive
Unforgiveness is a gathering of chains that begin to weigh me down and
I choose them myself
The Christmas carol...I am the ghost of Jacob Marley....
"Ebenezer Scrooge! These chains that I wear in death, I forged in
life!"
Scrooge admired his craftsmanship. "They're good chains," he said.
Chains look stylish – bling!
Chains are rusty and dirty
Chains are heavy
There
is nothing pretty about the chains of unforgiveness
You
drag them along in this life and they weigh you down……..
The
consequences of unforgiveness…
Bitterness
Others are defiled
Broken fellowship with God
If you refuse to forgive, you are living your life in your own strength
Thoughts are consumed with anger and sadness
Consider the consequences of forgiving
Love can come back in
They get grace from me
I get grace from God
I can move on to live…. [the divorced person that spent the rest of their lives
hating the person that they were married to….]
When
we forgive we can move on to live
Litany of forgiveness
the bible is filled with stories of forgiveness
David,
Jonah, Joseph’s brothers
Hosea’s wife – do you know the story???
Jesus
teaches much on forgiveness……..
Jn 4 the woman at the well.
Jn 8, the woman caught in adultery
The prodigal son
The
woman who washed his feet with her hair
The
story of the Pharisee and the publican
The
unmerciful servant
The disciples that deserted him
The thief on the cross
jesus
on the cross – father forgive them
Peters denials
Saul, murderer of Christians – unbelievable…..
Forgiveness
is unbelievable-what
God can do in a person who is willing
When Allied troops liberated the Ravensbruck concentration camp in 1945,
they stumbled onto the indescribable horror of the Nazi Moloch-machine in which
92,000 women and children had died. But they also came across signs of
unquenchable faith. The following words were found written on a piece of
wrapping paper near the body of a dead child:
O Lord, Remember not only the men and women of goodwill, but also those of ill
will.
But do not only remember the suffering they have inflicted on us,
Remember the fruits we brought thanks to this suffering,
Our comradeship, our loyalty, our humility, the courage, he generosity,
the greatness of heart which has grown our of all this
And when they come to judgment, Let all the fruits that we have borne
Be their forgiveness, Amen, Amen, Amen
Isis…….
Stretches my understanding of Christianity. Must protect our
society. Must put the evil out from among us. A war worth sending
my children
Gods story is bigger than the
current chapter of how well the bad guys are doing
Yet
we are invited to forgive…..
Matt
18:21 Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin
against me, and I forgive him? till seven times? 22 Jesus saith unto him,
I say not unto thee, Until seven times; but, Until seventy times seven.
7 times? 490 times?
Peter
thought that he had done enough
Peter
Rollins
story of going the third mile…………..
Our humanness gives us an opportunity to be small
Forgiveness gives us and opportunity to be great
When you are a player on the platform of pain, and you step in and truly
forgive,
you have chosen the right road, you have chosen the way of love, you have
chosen to bring a healing balm to the wounded, you have chosen to bring
greatness to the arena of life
Conclusion
Do
you want to start the process of forgiveness?
1. Choose to forgive and say the words
2. Make a choice not to tell anyone what they did
surrender
the right to revenge- We need to stop telling the stories. Then maybe someone
will stop remembering the person in that way
3. Be pleasant to them when around them
4. If conversation comes up, say words that release them from bondage
This allows them to feel good about themselves
5. Protect them from their fear
6. Pray for them –
forgive them,
bless them
understand
that something has to happen in our hearts between God and us. things change
when we realize that what needs to happen is not something between me and the
person, but between me and God
7. Finally forgiveness comes when we are able to wish them well. [I agree not
to be the instrument of gods wrath, but I hope that someone else gets them.]
Love your enemies, pray for those who use you
We cannot pray for someone and hate them at the same time.
Understand that they are not yours. They belong to God. Entrust them to God
See
jesus with them
Keep
it up – next week, next month, next year
I
am thankful for forgiveness.
See also 2 cor 5
17 Therefore,
if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come:[a]
The old has gone, the new is here! 18 All
this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the
ministry of reconciliation: 19 that God
was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting people’s sins
against them. And he has committed to us the message of reconciliation. 20
I
am thankful for forgiveness. It frees us from our sin. It frees us
from resenting others. It frees us to live. Forgiveness gets the
ugly out of the way and makes room for reconciliation, gratitude and joy
Forgiveness brings the promise that tomorrow
does not have to be a repeat of today….
